My second trimester spring

Ever since I found out I was due in September, I knew this pregnancy was going to be no piece of cake. With the first 4 months being one long winter wave of nausea, and the last 3 months being a sweaty summer lugging around an extra 30-40lbs, I was pretty much left with 2 months of feeling good enough to be productive before our second baby arrived. So naturally, being the borderline Type A, control freak that I am, anything that I wanted done just HAD to be done from mid-April to mid-June. Oh, and did I mention I hate spring? (Allergies, my friends, allergies).

I plan on writing separate brief blog entries about the two major projects we accomplished during this time (Ainsley's new room and our new roof) but I wanted to document some of my other recent thoughts and experiences before I forget them.

Despite my typical pains of pregnancy and loads of complaints, I have been absolutely in LOVE with my daughter lately. She is my little buddy, my adorable sidekick wherever I go. And now that her vocabulary and comprehension are shining, we can actually have conversations. It's truly amazing. Part of me wishes I wasn't pregnant so I could run around, play, plan activities and be a much more exciting mom than I have been. But on the other hand, I know I'm working on giving her one of the best gifts in the world - a sibling!

And to be honest, it really doesn't take much to entertain my little imaginative creator. Ainsley is so easily captivated that I don't feel too guilty if I don't have anything planned aside from cleaning the house and grocery shopping. I can literally put one new toy in front of her and she will play for an hour in her own whimsical world. Watching her is like watching a movie, she's the one entertaining me.

Don't get me wrong, raising a two-year old does not come without its challenges. There were a couple days in the spring where I thought I was going to lose my mind because she wouldn't stop screaming over everything. She was throwing herself on the floor and I was putting her in time-out for what felt like every 10 mins! Even with a daughter as articulate as Ainsley, it can be very hard to know what's causing her distress. It's so hard to know whether I'm handling the situation in the best way possible, and it's so hard not to question my parenting. Thankfully, this time around, it was a short-lived dose of defiance and she was back to her obliging, obedient self within a week. I still wonder, however, if the extra-crabby phase was a simply result of her not feeling well or if I dealt with her so effectively that she decided never to cross me again. HA! Yeah right!

I'm sure the latter is not the case, as I don't think putting your kid in time-out every time he or she screams is the most effective method, nor is crying or screaming along with them. But regardless of how I've been coping with her tantrums, it's the sweet little moments that reinstate my confidence as a mom: the unprompted "please" and "thank-you's", the "Mommy, you look beautiful. I like your dress," and, of course, the special times when she takes my face in her chubby little hands, puts her nose directly in front of mine and says, "Mommy, I love you so much." All are things I repeatedly say to her to make her feel good, so when I hear it come back around full-circle I know I must be doing something right.